Boundary Waters Quetico Forum :: Listening Point - General Discussion :: Overheard in the BWCA
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Phil/TX |
The funniest thing I heard once was absolute silence - I was Traveling with a group of Teen guys and some Dads. We were on the way out after a week long trip exiting BWCA entry #16 Moose River North - We had entered Little Indian Souix #14 . So we were heading south and had arrived at the base of a waterfall with a portage. By this point the Guys had been talking about several things along the lines , feeling pretty Macho for doing a pretty long trip how many miles etc and they were almost done. Cannot wait for shower, cokes real food etc. As we arrived at the portage we saw people had left a bunch of packs etc etc . So we sat on the water in our canoes and waited to see what was up. Then coming down the trail is a bunch of girls in their bright pink , yellow , blue , shorts and bikini's all clean and really looking more like a bunch of cheerleaders rather than outdoorsy types- obviously on their first hours in- just so juxtaposed to this situation. I looked around at our group and all the teen guys were just staring some even with their mouths open chin in their lap. Even to me it was shocking somewhat. And no one said a word no howdy ... nothing . The rest of the Dads and I had a good laugh on that one . |
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hwdhusky |
We hear this group of younger kids which I assume were boy scouts or similar group. Two 3 person canoes and 1 two person canoe. The two 3 man canoes are zig-zagging across the entire lake having a loud conversation about how they hope the island site is open. We can see the one 2 man canoe behind the others (the two dads we are guessing). When one of the canoes of boys sees my friend and canoe down by the shore he yells to the other 3 man canoe... "If he is soloing we can still camp there." I wasn't sure I heard him right so I make my way down to the shore and sure enough when I get into their view they start yelling. "Oh no, there are two of them, that puts us over the limit!!!" |
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Fearlessleader |
Her job was to net the fish he caught, but she never got into the spirit of it. Finally he caught a really nice northern, somewhere near 40 inches. After much screaming and yelling back and forth, she did manage to net the fish. After it was done, she said something we still quote today---"Boy, I hope that never happens again!!!" |
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paddlefamily |
quote bassnet: "Both my partner and I are healthcare professionals (paramedic, RRT). A canoe comes up to us one morning: "Do to have a Sat phone? We have a medical emergency, somebody died!" Wow...that's quite the story. What happened? |
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spud |
He told me one on if his trips he crossed paths with another group.. one of the guys said to him, "I see you are out of water, did you need some of ours?" Perplexed, he turned and pointed to the lake and told them that he had all the water he needed there. The other guy in that other group got upset with his partner and exclaimed "see howard i told you we didnt need to bring water!". Turns out they were portaging 5 gallon containers of water for their trip... I couldn't imagine lugging around and portaging water for a trip! |
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mutz |
quote bassnet: "Both my partner and I are healthcare professionals (paramedic, RRT). A canoe comes up to us one morning: "Do to have a Sat phone? We have a medical emergency, somebody died!" I hope this one was meant as a joke, because no healthcare professionals that I know would ever make a joke to someone who had just experienced a tragedy like that. |
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jamotrade |
From that point on, whenever we go through a dry spell on our fishing trips, someone always chimes in (think Larry the Cable Guy southern accent) with "we might want to lose the Jitterbugs". We consider it our magic way to break through a tough day. |
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card0056 |
Me: "Yes." From the back of the boat, "Good. I will need you to turn this thing around and show me." My brother and I have been doing trips for 18 years and this simple exchange is the one that gets me laughing every time. |
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bassnet |
My partner said: "We don't have a sat phone and you don't have an emergency!!" |
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egknuti |
Me: "If you want your trip to end early, take the rapids. Portages are here for a reason." |
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SevenofNine |
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crumpman |
My wife, son, daughter, and her boyfriend Tim (might have been fiancé by this time), now husband, and I took a trip into Ensign for a week. It was a chance for Tim to vacation with the family. In our gear, we have a green stuff sack designated as the "go bag", for trips to the latrine. I contains TP, wet wipes, purell, and a Suzy Bugnet for bug protection. One morning my son took his morning constitutional and disappeared for a bit. After a while, we all heard a clear call from the woods..."I grabbed the wrong green bag." We all fell out and responded in various ways to his call for help. I did take him the correct green bag. We all wondered how long it took him to cry out for help, knowing he would take the razing for his dilemma. I told told my daughter that had Tim grabbed the wrong green bag, she would have been up as the barer of the correct green bag. The story is a part of family lore. |
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gsfisher13 |
quote Jackfish: "quote riverrunner: "Electric hair dyers, all kinds of cosmetics, a complete croquet set, a two foot tall bong are among some of the strangest things I seen in the wilderness. " I think the answer to that question depends whether they packed the portable generator for the electric hair dryer. I mean if they planned ahead, the electric hair dryer really doesn't sound that crazy ;) |
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overthehill |
"Thank goodness! I bet we added a mile of paddling if you count all the zig zagging." "Well, you were the one in the front who's supposed to do the steering!" "Hurry up, That canoe that was way back there is almost here.". as they drug the loaded Kevlar over the rocks well onto dry ground. When I got to the top of the long hill maybe 20 rods in, it was: "Stop! This ain't working. Let's put a couple of these packs on and then see if we can carry it." The canoe was still loaded. |
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yogi59weedr |
All of a sudden they stopped canoeing and we could hear the lady say, "Would ya look at the size of that f***** flag??" We all busted up laughing. I would always take my dad's funeral flag and hang it in camp. Kind of a tribute to dad. It definitely made a statement. Nowadays, I still hang the flag, but at Fall Lake campground. |
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BSW |
quote timatkn: "I fished near a portage near an entry point one time and consistently over heard from women when their significant other wasn't around, "this portaging wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't carrying his ...expletive...tackle bag too" THIS got a laugh from both hubby and me. Thanks |
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BSW |
quote MikeinMpls: "Father, son and another guy come up to me on a portage, I can't remember exactly where (it was a long time ago.) OH MY Goodness Mike! We were on Lake One in July and had a huge group leaving singing that song! Heard them across the lake. ~~ |
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BSW |
Anyway, I get to the end of the portage and hear people off to my left and I think it's people viewing the rapids. I start back to see if I can help hauling anything else and this disheveled guy from the woods said, "hey, where did you come from?" I just looked at him and pointed to my right. He said, "The portage? Where does it start?" When I told him, he said, "Well, that's too far away now", and then I see they have their canoes and all the gear. They missed the portage and started down the rapids! They must have gone to shore (luckily) and were bushwacking it. No way they would have made it down the rapids. I don't know how they made it as far as they did. ~~ |
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rdricker |
"What's that smell?" "That's terrible..." "Oh, it's us!" |
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scat |
Well, as we were floating just off the portage, it became obvious they were going to be there a while so we picked our way through the mass of gear. I noticed they were carrying at least two collapsible five gallon containers of water. That had to be fun to portage. The one jag dad was imploring his son to drink water. 'You have to drink more water!' he kept telling him. Like the kid was going to die of thirst from a morning of light paddling and walking in the woods. The kid answered in that high pitched voice that I love so much and that I believe would come out of the mouth of a member of the Vienna Boys Choir who just got kicked in the nuts, ' But I'm not thirsty!' Classic. We chuckled about that the rest of the trip. Still makes me smile. Cheers. |
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scat |
On a trip with my son, we base camped at Shell Lake and stayed at the south end campsite on Conn Island. There are three campsites on the island and they are all premo, ours being the least desirable, maybe. It wasn't the most fun trip because my son was at a weird stage or our relationship was, but whatever, we stayed around the campsite more than I like to. It is a busy lake and our site faced the open lake and sometimes I felt like a tour director telling passersby which sites were open, etc. One afternoon, I noticed a group come in heading toward Conn and I think I told them all the island sites were taken and they ended up on a site across the lake with what looked like a forty five degree slope to it. Not ideal. They had two canoes with small kids, one a 20' four seater. The next morning I was chilling out with my feet in the lake and a guy from the middle site paddled by to go fishing and we chatted briefly, (a lot of chatting with strangers on this trip), and he told me they were pulling out that morning. Me, a bit too absorbed in my newfound role as tour guide perhaps, paddled across the lake to the new guys' site with the intent of telling them that the much desired middle site on Conn Island would be open in a bit. I pulled closer and one boy, probably about eight, yelled, ' dad someone's coming!' So I told them the site would be open and it's a good one, premo, just like the Taj Mahal. A day or two later my son and I were cruising by the middle site and the cutest little girl with blonde curly hair was standing on the shore. I would say she was about three years old and I mean cute as a button. Just a little doll. I asked her, "how do you like the campsite?' She answered so sweetly and happily it would make your heart melt, 'It's great, it's the Taj Mahal!' Still love that. |
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unshavenman |
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Arcola |
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nofish |
quote emptynest56: "Technically not in the BW, but very close: This one reminds me of a weekend trip with friends down to Whitewater State Park. A big group of us were camping on 2 adjoining sites with a 3rd site close by that was occupied by an unknown couple. The first night everyone in our group woke up to sounds of the young couple in the 3rd site expressing just how much they liked each other. The couple made only a half hearted attempt at being quiet and apparently the female participant was rather particular in what she was looking for and was not afraid of vocalizing her wishes. Because of that every single person in our group had a pretty vivid mental image of what was going on in that 3rd site. The next morning we all crawl out of our tents just waiting for the first person to bring up the performance we all heard the night before. After all sharing a laugh we look over to see lover couple crawling out of their tent. We could barely hold ourselves together as we tried to avoid all eye contact. I'm not sure if they knew how much we heard, none of us thought to go ask. 10 years later and we all still joke about it anytime any of us goes camping. |
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bfurlow |
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bottomtothetap |
One of these pack checks revealed a curling iron that was hidden toward the bottom of a bag. I asked the girl just where she was hoping to plug it in and just how long was the chord hidden in what other pack. She said that she did realize that electricity was not available in the wilderness but seriously had planned to warm the curling iron with the campfire and use it that way! I convinced her that we all appreciated her internal beauty enough that whatever messy hair she experienced was not going to bother anyone else in our group and that she shouldn't worry about it either. The curling iron stayed behind. |
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greywolf33 |
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scat |
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schweady |
"Where's the lake?... Huh? No, where's the lake?... Don't tell me. All the way up here, I thought you guys were s***ting me... There's no lake..." Later that morning, after walking down to the valley bottom and coming upon the USFS sign: "Stand over there by that sign; I'll take your picture." "Why? What's the sign doing out here?" "It marks the BWCA border. It means you're now in the Boundary Waters." Confused pause. Pointing back to the path on which we had just come: "So, what the f*** was all THAT back THERE?!..." |
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OgimaaBines |
Me: How are you enjoying the trip? Fella: Great! It's beautiful out here. Last night we had moose running all over camp! My friend: You're kidding! What the hell was going on? Fella: We didn't see them but we heard them running by in the woods. You could feel the hoof beats on the ground! (He proceeded to drum on his chest, slow at first then faster). Me: You know, partridge will drum on their chests like that during their mating season... sounds a lot like that. Fella: No, this thing was BIG. My friend and I look at each other and shrugged. |
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mc2mens |
quote boonie: "I was on a long solo trip and met a father/son tandem at a portage. They had a big old beast of a canoe and a jumble of giant packs, duffels, boots, fishing equipment, and one trash bag . . . with ? It all had to weigh 3X as much as mine and the canoe twice as much. :) |
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RiverFisher |
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jdevries |
#1 - single portaging my solo stripper and a pack on the Fall-Newton portage, I had the canoe perfectly balanced and was just lightly holding it with one hand when I come across a rather large woman headed the other way struggling with a pack. She takes one look at me, put's her hand on her hip, and tells me, 'honey, for the benefit of others out here, you should at least make it look like it's hard work'. She then turns around in the direction I'm going, and in a voice just like Howard's mother on Big Bang Theory, she yells "Harold! Would you take a look at this guy? He's carrying EVERYTHING. Get up here and carry this damn pack!!" #2 - myself, my buddy Jim, my mother, and my dad are having lunch at a beautiful spot at the end of a portage. Jim and I are probably around 15 at the time and suddenly a group of young ladies in cutoffs and bikinis comes bounding off the portage, dumps their gear, and jumps in the water, boots and all. When they came back out things up top had, um, begun poking out shall we say? Jim looks straight at my mother and says, "My, my, that water is COLD". That statement has stuck with us for 40 years, whenever any mention of temperature comes up in the conversation. JD |
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DougD |
We stopped at the next available camp site. |
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riverrunner |
The story is kind of long but funny It was a much harder place to get into the BOB Marshall wilderness in Montana miles from the trail head over a 7000 plus foot pass. Here's the story my hiking partner spent two day hiking into big salmon lake we were camped at the out let end of the lake and decided to do a day hike to the head of the lake. We took a light day pack and headed out as we were about a half a mile from the head we noticed small one man raft out on the lake with some one fishing from it. My first though was some one brought it in with horses. A little bit later we saw a group of five tents camped down by the lake being a social fellow and I like talking to fellow wilderness travelers we decide to stop by and have a chat. As we walked into the camp there were five tents and four fellows in there 20's sitting around the fifth was out in the raft. Being a highly trained LEO at the time I noticed the two foot bong, six or seven liter bottles of vodka and mix. A bunch of smaller coolers and lots of other gear way too much for just five guys. As we talked and uncovered their story seems this was there first real back packing trip. They were from CA and done a lot of real camping in Yosemite NP where they had to carry their gear a whole hundred yard off the road. One of them had the grand idea after reading about the BOB that it would be a great place to go and it is. So he convinced his camping friends to go on a real camping trip in real wilderness so they made their plans. Decided where to go and seeing big salmon lake and reading what great fishing was to be had in the BOB they picked out the shortest route to the lake. Wrong choice it might be the shortest but it sure isn't the easiest a lot of up. Those elevation lines on the maps really mean something. Being real men they decide they each needed their own tent can't sleep in the same tent. Food to them meant real food in coolers, cans, bottles, bacon eggs and potatoes . Plus what camping trip isn't a trip with out a full complement of alcoholic drinks. We are going to a lake we need at least one raft to go fishing in and lots of fishing gear. Plus for sleeping we not only need our own tent we need our favorite pillow and thick air mattress's to sleep on. Then we know that smoking dope is much better using a bong then papers we bring a big bong. As we sat around and talking to them it was obvious that 4 of the five would never ever be doing a BACK PACKING TRIP AGAIN. The organizer was very interested in learn what they did wrong and how to do it properly. He sounded like he would be come a back packer. We spend a couple hours visiting with them talking back packing planning what to bring and what not to bring. Training for it, reading maps and all the good stuff one should know. Nice guys but totally clueless to wilderness back packing. Then here it comes just as we were getting up to leave the leader said. What are we going to do with that. He then pointed to a tree about 20 feet away and leaning against it was a full read it again a FULL COMPLETE croquet set MALLETS BALLS HOOPS every thing. As I saw it I couldn't help myself and said you really didn't pack that in did you. The answer was obvious of course we did how else do you think it got here. But now what are we going to do with it. I said I hope you plan to play a few rounds,then before you leave you can burn all the wooden parts pack out the rest. Or you know of that nice meadow at the head of the lake set it up there and leave a nice note saying feel free to play a round this was left for your Entertainment. My hiking buddy and I had some very good laughs as we walked back to our camp and still do to this day when ever we talk about that trip. Hoped you enjoyed the story. I don't know what their packs weighed but I am guessing well on the north side of 100lbs What normally would have been a long hard one day hike took these fellows two hard full days with a camp one night in not a very comfortable spot. I am really surprised they didn't turn around then. |
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Kobykat |
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emptynest56 |
My young family(at the time)and I were camping at the Fall Lake USFS campground one Labor Day weekend. In the middle of the night, I awoke to what seemed to be horrible wailing. I thought, WTH, and got concerned as I listened to any further sounds. It soon became apparent what it was was a couple in an adjacent campsite filled with ardor and desire in their tent. For the next 10 minutes I was kicking myself for not bringing earplugs. |
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HighnDry |
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bottomtothetap |
A couple that come to mind: "You mean I'm really going to have to get my feet wet? Are you sure there isn't a way around it? These are the only socks I brought and I don't wan to get them wet" ...as another group's dog is wandering around freely at portage landing, "Marv, you should probably get a handle on that dog. If he craps in someone else's canoe again like the other day, I wouldn't blame them at all if they're bothered by it." Our group hearing this led to a long-running joke of stating obvious instructions and prefacing them with "Marv..." no matter was talking to who. Examples: "Marv, you should probably gather some wood. If we try to start a fire without out wood we just won't get it to stay burning." or, "Marv, You should probably carry that pack across the portage. If you don't it will get left behind and then we'll be short of gear again." |
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anthonyp007 |
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Flannelshirt |
No further questions... |
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nctry |
On Ogish there was a guy I never saw around the corner at another site. All Bernie and I heard was bad dog bad dog. Bernie just looked at me like how can a dog be that bad? I wanted to go over and say bad owner... haha. Then on Boulder Lake I heard someone coming from the Adams portages. They came by my site and kept on to the other site. They seemed nice enough, but the guy never shut up and sounded like he was bickering, so I dubbed them the Bickersons. I went to sleep and woke up to the bickering. Haha. |
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nojobro |
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LuvMyBell |
quote boonie: "I was on a long solo trip and met a father/son tandem at a portage. They had a big old beast of a canoe and a jumble of giant packs, duffels, boots, fishing equipment, and one trash bag . . . with ? It all had to weigh 3X as much as mine and the canoe twice as much. This is the funniest one so far...Classic |
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TominMpls |
quote riverrunner: " a complete croquet set" I really enjoy the absurdity of hauling a croquet set into the BWCA. That goes beyond simply not doing your research. I bet there's a story there. |
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MikeinMpls |
"You go ahead. You look like you know what you're doing." "You look like you've done this a time or two." I'm sure others have heard similar, but I can't tell you how good that made me feel. All my obsessions about packs and being wired-tight at least gave someone the impression that I was competent!! Mike |
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Jackfish |
quote riverrunner: "Electric hair dyers, all kinds of cosmetics, a complete croquet set, a two foot tall bong are among some of the strangest things I seen in the wilderness. " Cosmetics? I suppose I could see some women doing that. A two foot tall bong? Based on some comments I've read on the board over the years, I could imagine seeing that. But it's a toss-up on the craziest of the other two. Electric hair dryers or a CROQUET SET? They're both so ridiculous that I almost have to call BS. |
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dew042 |
Much funnier in retrospect. Daniel |
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nojobro |
quote Jackfish: "quote riverrunner: "Electric hair dyers, all kinds of cosmetics, a complete croquet set, a two foot tall bong are among some of the strangest things I seen in the wilderness. " We just saw a canoe with their gear in trash bags and laundry baskets |
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gkimball |
2) I once base camped on a solo trip near a popular jumping rock in early June. Over the course of 4 days several groups of young people (I was 65 then so I can call them young people) showed up to jump and have fun. I could not see the jump site, but I could hear it when a group arrived, and especially when they hit the water. I could also hear their reaction to the water temps that were, evidently, quite a bit lower than what they expected. Got a few chuckles from what became a repetitious pattern - a splash sound immediately followed by a consistent, predictable, high pitched howling OOOOOOAAAHHHHH!!!???!!!! Another version was just a simple, emphatic OOOOOOOO!!!! Some of these spontaneous expressions might have carried for a mile. The gals were the loudest. Often followed by short statements I couldn't make out but could have been something like "Why did you suggest this, you idiot!" Live and learn! |
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bottomtothetap |
quote nofish: "quote emptynest56: "Technically not in the BW, but very close: Great description! I laughed out loud just "connecting the dots" and imagining the scene! |
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jcavenagh |
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airmorse |
quote jcavenagh: "If a bear comes, you dance around and distract him while I take out my knife and hamstring him from behind!" That is funny. |
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QueticoMike |
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MikeinMpls |
Father to me: "Can you show me where we are on the map?" Me responding: "You're not on this map. You're off the map." Father: "Oh, I wonder how that happened." In all my trips, I've heard a lot of stuff. To me, what is said can be interesting, but the fact that I can hear anything at all is disturbing. I'm not talking about a bow and stern paddler conversing. I'm talking about one canoe yelling to another, several hundred yards away- "The portage is over there!" On my last trip, a group of three canoes passed my campsite, one of the canoes singing "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall..." The "singer" was on number 89 when she passed me. Mike |
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MikeinMpls |
quote QueticoMike: "( At the first portage ) Can you watch our packs, we need to go back to the entry point, we forgot the food pack back at the outfitters? Mike in Minneapolis burying his head in his hands....... Mike in Minneapolis |
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aholmgren |
overheard a dad say to his son from the canoe, " ****, you know that new waterproof GPS mom gave me for Christmas, well it doesn't float" |
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AmarilloJim |
quote cowdoc: "Meeting a strung out group of poorly prepared people on the Missing link portage. We were headed out to Round, they were headed in (their first portage). Hope they weren't going to Tuscarora! |
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riverrunner |
quote Freddy: "quote riverrunner: "Mostly when a newbie opens their pack you brought that." Electric hair dyers, all kinds of cosmetics, a complete croquet set, a two foot tall bong are among some of the strangest things I seen in the wilderness. Full size coolers and ice on a trip that requires a lot portaging . It is very common to hear why did I bring that. |
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paddlefamily |
I can't seem to recall anything good other than, "you didn't tell me that this portage had a hill". |
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nofish |
I was tempted to set the map guy straight as to where they were but he was in no danger of getting tragically lost so I left him and his group to figure things out for themselves. I suspect the teens were so eager to get home because their leader probably had them paddling in circles the entire trip trying to figure out where the next portage was. |
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riverrunner |
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missmolly |
quote riverrunner: "quote Freddy: "quote riverrunner: "Mostly when a newbie opens their pack you brought that." There is a hidden bennie to an electric hair dryer. With a long enough cord, you'll always know the way home. |
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ozarkpaddler |
quote nojobro: "We just returned from a trip. One of our campsites was near a portage and so we could overhear things people were saying sometimes. Our favorite was "I'm never wearing skinny jeans into the Boundary Waters again!" Someone's taking Stu's tip about wearing jeans to the BWCAW, huh (LOL)? From a member in my own party years ago who was SUPPOSED to bring their own gear "I thought YOU brought tents for everybody?" Well, maybe more "Sad" than "Funny" at the time, but I laugh about it now (LOL)? |
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A1t2o |
"Why would we need a rain fly?" "We don't need to bring food. We'll catch it fishing." |
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Freddy |
quote riverrunner: "Mostly when a newbie opens their pack you brought that." Probably a gun and ten pounds of ammo! |
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timatkn |
After fishing I immediately broke down my tackle bag and made sure it was packed up in a Duluth style pack. After portaging my wife asked where the tackle bag was and I told her I was packing it different she replied "good, the portaging wasn't bad except for carrying that ...expletive...tackle bag of yours...thanks" T |
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boonie |
quote timatkn: "I fished near a portage near an entry point one time and consistently over heard from women when their significant other wasn't around, "this portaging wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't carrying his ...expletive...tackle bag too" :) |
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boonie |
"How long you in for", he asked. "Twelve days", I said. " "Where's the rest of your stuff", he asked, as I shoved off. "That's all of it", I said. As I paddled away, I heard him say to his son, "You get people coming in here who just don't know what they're doing. I hope he makes it OK". I was thinking the same thing. |
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Grandma L |
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Spartan2 |
Spartan1 looked over at me and I returned his look of puzzlement. Should we say anything? These people obviously didn't know where they were. Should we clue them in? We decided we had to. Come to find out, they had been on a trip for a couple days, and the only map they had was a little line drawing of their route that they had been given by the outfitter. Otherwise, they had no map at all! My husband was shocked! He showed them on his map where they actually were, where "Lake Insula" actually was, and since we always travel with a double set of maps, one for each of us, I gave them my map for the rest of their trip. I have often wondered if they ever got home. And now whenever we are "misplaced" on a canoe trip, or even on a road trip, it isn't unusual for one of us to say, "Ah, Lake Insula!" |
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Spartan2 |
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nojobro |
quote Spartan2: "Incidentally, Nola, this is a very funny thread. Thanks. :-)" I agree. And the best part are the stories like yours where the phrase becomes a "thing." John and I have one of those, but not from the BW. It's "are you gonna eat that?" (Actually the whole quote is "are you gonna eat that, or do I have to shove it up your ass?!" But we never have to say the whole thing. I'll leave y'all to wonder at the situation we were in when that was overheard... |
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nojobro |
From another trip, there was this one: Guy 1: Watch out for that rock Guy 2: ... Guy 1: Watch out for that rock! Guy 2: ... (canoe smacks rock) Guy 1: Dumbass! What have you overheard in the BW that tickled your funny bone? |
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riverrunner |
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cowdoc |
Every last one of them asked, "are we almost to the end?" |