I am self-employed and child-free and struggling with social isolation as all of my old friendships fade away as they prioritize other things. I've really been struggling to find friends to share experiences with as meeting new like-minded people in one's 30s is next to impossible, and I'm getting tired of only getting responses from crickets whenever I try to invite anyone to share some time, wilderness trip or otherwise.

I am curious if anyone knows of any public events/meetups within this realm of canoeing/camping/backpacking where one might stand a better chance of making new connections. I know about Canoecopia, of course, but I've found that to be a bit too commercial to really work for forging new social connections. I also know there is a group of hammockers that will do group outings once in awhile, but I never know about them until after they've happened.

I am out of practice and tend to be a bit reserved when first meeting new people and take a bit to warm-up and open-up. I worry about established small groups being impenetrable to newcomers, but there is no way around that, but to try.

Consider volunteering with a local ecological restoration / stewardship program. For about a year now I've been going to the workdays for a local program that removes invasive species and replaces them with native plants in various parks/preserves. If you go consistently then you'll have a good opportunity to chat with the regulars and start to make connections.

The beauty of this plan is that:
1. You know the people that keep coming back are interested in the outdoors and seeing them repeatedly can make forging friendships easier
2. Having a common task helps to break the ice and ease conversations
3. You get to give back while being outside meeting like-minded people!

Finding your tribe can be so hard -- keep trying and best of luck!

I don't have any tripping-related advice in terms of meeting new people, but I can say that I relate to your post. I'm in my early 40's and I have come to grips with the fact that having 1 or 2 friends that I see every month or two is probably how it's gonna be.

There are some hobbies that seem to really value community, so you might explore some other options. Cycling is one of those. There are group rides and riding clubs all over the state.

Volunteering at something you care about is another way to meet like-minded people and you'll likely get back more than you put in. Last summer I made my first "new" friend in about 10 years by volunteering to help lead rides for our local youth mountain biking team.

try Meetup.com for events happening in your area. there are lots of categories to choose from.

i, too, am an introvert. having left my life of 30 years Up North, that means also leaving my closest friends, as well.

you'd think living in your hometown would be a shoe-in for reconnecting with people from the past. they are out there but everyone changes over time and it can be difficult to reconnect.

one positive about covid and the forced isolation is that i'm okay with that! i don't mind being by myself or just me and my husband going for drives, fishing, looking for animals....

if i was set on meeting new people i'd have to suck it up and learn how to be comfortable with that, i guess.

Generally introverted 30 year old based in the Twin Cities here. I am a transplant in MN, and have found it heard to break into the tight social circles that it seems many native Minnesotans keep.

If you are looking for like-minded folks who enjoy canoeing/backpacking, check out the Boundary Waters Advisory Committee (BWAC, pronounced bee whack). They run trail maintenance trips on the Powwow Trail. You can find them on Meetup. I have only gotten involved semi-recently, but it seems to be a great group of people.

Just gonna chime in with a few comments on things mentioned so far.
Thanks for responding, everyone. I really appreciate it.

Volunteering is on my radar. I spent 10 years as a biologist working in in natural areas management, invasive species control, lake management, prescribed firings, etc, so that's something I can do quite easily if I can find the right group that I can sync up with. Volunteering in the past has been a rough experience for me as I ended up feeling like it was another job, and if I was just being expected to treat it like another job. I'd rather just schedule more of my actual work for myself and make some more money. I gather that it doesn't have to be that way, but it's hard to shake bad experiences like that.

Throughout high school and college, mountain biking was my life. I never managed to make any social connections through cycling in all that time even though I had joined a club/team and raced in WORS. I found that riding with others was just like riding alone except for knowing the name of the butt ahead of you. Probably my fault for not doing it right.

I have never once found Meetup helpful. I don't know if I've used it wrong, but I find next to zero groups in my area in my interests (obviously I have more I terests than just various forms of wilderness tripping). The few hits I do get are often very small women-only groups and repetitive online events. I'm in southeast WI, so it isn't like I'm in an area with few people.

Here is a link to a volunteer groups that does work in the BWCA that may be of interest to the OP Boundary Waters Advisory Committee

I believe USFS has other info on volunteering in Superior Nation Forest as well

plander: "Here is a link to a volunteer groups that does work in the BWCA that may be of interest to the OP Boundary Waters Advisory Committee

I believe USFS has other info on volunteering in Superior Nation Forest as well"

I'll definitely be taking a look.

If you are just looking for socializing try a book group, library functions church/bible study, find a comfy coffee shop/Internet cafe and hang out at the same time same day for a few weeks and see what transpires. Go hang at a city park or dog park, become a dog walker.

Most people always say hi to the dog! Then u can always chime in with a jovial Hello if you feel like it.

My social circle in my new town gelled quickly by going to the dog park. That led to dinners at each other's place and babysitting each other's dog and walks and so on.

I am well beyond my 30's now, but found out years ago that our local Sierra Club was a great place to meet outdoor minded young people.

mschi772: "Throughout high school and college, mountain biking was my life. I never managed to make any social connections through cycling in all that time even though I had joined a club/team and raced in WORS. I found that riding with others was just like riding alone except for knowing the name of the butt ahead of you. Probably my fault for not doing it right."

Minnesota Cycling Association is worth checking out. They have volunteer opportunities all over the state, from racing to logistics. Fun group of people in my 1 year of experience.

If you're into beer, there are some ride/social clubs you might look into. The one I'm aware of (but not part of) is Utepils Cycling. A typical group ride will end back at the brewery for social time, which is potentially better than just getting to know someone's butt.

haha sounds like me! In my 30's like to bike, I have a dog, and not a ton of friends.

Will turn 30 in September. Self-employed. Almost identical social issues as others on this thread. Also a lack of nature in my life the past few years. Can be really tough. Mental health is often overlooked until it's too late for some people. It's not my business where you're at mentally, but I'm more than happy to provide my phone # to any BWCA member who could use a pick-me-up via phone conversation. I'd offer more, but I live in New Mexico.

Are you a member of a church? We have had anywhere from 4 to 16 guys paddle every summer for the last 20+ years. Church is a great place to meet and make new friends. And if it is a healthy congregation with a good age spread it is a fertile place to recruit new paddle partners.

We had some luck, as well as some disaster, meeting people through Facebook groups devoted to different sports, something like Ontario Outdoors (Paddling, Tripping...) Partners Wanted or Kids Mountain Biking in (add any area). Sorry, can't give more specific links. I hate social media, but in that instance it worked way better than canoeing forums, because its reach is much wider and also many people getting involved in some activity and looking for a like-minded company probably never heard of specific forums, like this one, and naturally resort to FB.

Another aspect of finding a group is making the connection. As noted, knowing the name of the butt ahead is not connecting. Locating groups or even individuals through compatible interests is a start. Finding other compatible interests and values is next. It might help to plan your introduction. It is a lot like dating.

You may have already checked this out. It is near you, does include a number of activities, has a membership of over 1600 and appears one of our BWCA members is one of the organizers.
There have been a lot of good ideas and hopefully you will get more. I am a much older introverted female and have been in your shoes; losing my outdoor activities partners due to poor health, memory problems, moves out of the area, etc.
Good luck with your search and keep trying. You'll find something that meshes with your needs.

Outdoors Meetup Group

I'll second (or third) meetup.com. I don't use it to meet people, but DO use it for group bike rides when I'm out of town. I can see how those that are regulars in the group would form a small community and some would even form friendships.

I can totally relate. We have lived just outside of a small rural town for many years. There aren’t any local dog parks, bike clubs, etc. other than pool league etc. Yes, visiting the bars is the local pastime, which we really don’t enjoy. So our social interactions lately have been few and far between. While I have mostly learned to deal with it, my husband is going crazy. We’ve tried volunteering but the friendships usually don’t go past that activity. It is frustrating.

I don’t really have any answers for you other than what others have suggested. Try volunteering at a few different activities, and hopefully you’ll be comfortable with at least one of them. Stay busy doing things you enjoy and be willing to interact with strangers when you encounter them. If anyone wants to do any paddling/biking/fishing/camping/skiing in central WI, I’d love to meet!

WonderMonkey: "I'll second (or third) meetup.com. I don't use it to meet people, but DO use it for group bike rides when I'm out of town. I can see how those that are regulars in the group would form a small community and some would even form friendships."

Ah I noticed that you have already been on Meetup. Maybe look in areas that are bit further away from you?

woodsandwater: "Are you a member of a church?"

Atheist.

I'm open to sharing some time and live close. If you can put up with a old geezer. I'd be open to a brew and swapping tall tales at your convenience.

butthead

butthead: "I'm open to sharing some time and live close. If you can put up with a old geezer. I'd be open to a brew and swapping tall tales at your convenience.


butthead"

Yeah, we should meet up in some fashion at some point. I won't pretend like there's no difference between younger peers, similar-age peers, and older peers, but that doesn't mean I've got anything against any "old geezers" either.

If you're still into cycling either Mt Bike or Road. There's a great club out of Lake Geneva called the Treadheads. Very diverse with skill level, well organized, and very welcoming. All ages. The road rides are twice a week usually around LG, but the Mt Bike rides are, Silver Lake, Kenosha, Alpine Valley, Kettle Moraine and LG.I did the WORS series for a while still do about 4 a year. I know what you mean. If you haven't made a connection with a least one or 2 people on your team you are just out there on your own. It can be a bit cliquey

Finding new friends is never easy for some of us and definitely doesn't get easier as you get older. In the early days of the internet, I logged on to a "Paddlers" web site looking for like-minded folk-------------- they were not about paddling canoes.

Go to the Canoecopia BWCA get together or go to the show wearing the flying moose badge.

When I was in your situation a couple decades ago, I joined a local paddling club. It was a great way to learn new skills, meet new people, have fun outdoors, and connect with outings in the region.

A few things I thought of, regardless of the social activity/circumstances, that may seem simple... but can go to the wayside in the hustle and bustle. I am close to a couple self-described introverts (I'm told I am an extrovert) and these are things we have discussed in the past.

Upon eye contact, be sure to smile! it is kind of like 'I am open for business!' sign. to the contrary if you look away immediately, it communicates the opposite.

First impressions are huge and people will often decide if they want to engage within the first minute or so. Two things work great to 'grease the wheels' of conversation. 1-a genuine compliment, doesn't have to be of major importance, even just a 'I dig your shoes, dude!' 2- ask questions (and listen!) and ask follow up questions. Don't revert to talking about yourself in moments of silence. in fact, try to avoid talking too much about yourself in general. Which can be hard in the heat of the moment. I can't count how many times I see people say 'no one listens anymore'. Introverts tend to look inside first, yes? listening takes practice. People will appreciate your attention and interest. A potentially good friend will reciprocate.

Music - the language we can all understand. whether at a pub, festival, market etc. people who take the time to listen to music tend to be on the nicer side of things (from my observations) and it provides an immediate topic at hand. Performances have been sparse last couple of years but performers and audience are eager to get out and mingle as well!

I hope this is of some help and I commend you for your honesty. Sorry if it is of no help. your line of 'Probably my fault for not doing it right.' is what caught my eye. Don't dwell on past missed opportunities but work on making positive changes for yourself and others. Start small, meeting just one person, don't worry about 'joining the group' :) Let your love light shine, dude

The Ice Age Trail has a number of local and statewide groups getting together for trail building, maintenance, and related stuff. Check out the Ice Age Trail Alliance online. I met great people volunteering for the Madison Ironman kayak team. They will have a booth in the hallway at Canoecopia. About 30 or 40 kayak volunteers monitor the Lake Monona swim course for the early Sept Ironman. There was a diversity of folks taking the PADI open water scuba diver course. I didn’t keep diving very often, but the class plugged into groups meeting up around the state for dive weekends and for Caribbean and other trips. I also recommend Rutabaga’s classes and experiences throughout paddling season. My wife and I met some really good folks doing some of their evening paddles and taking classes.

You are not alone. I found myself in your situation in the past and many of us do whether we live urban or rural, have kids or not, bike or bowl, paddle or peddle. I only have one really good friend outside of my family. I met him totally by chance. My best non-family BWCA experience was going with a guy who bought my house and happened to see my canoe and tell me he loved the BW but had nobody to go with. I had to let my guard down a little to let people find me and to find them. Good luck!

I agree that finding and keeping good friends is hard. I am 56 and at any point in my life, I have generally only had a few good friends. I have some old friends that I see periodically, and a few good friends.

Listen to wise advice like smiling when you meet people. Think of that cute gal that meets everyone with a smile. Watch people who have lots of friends. There is a reason. I second the idea of being a good listener. Another thing to understand is that to have a friend, you need to be a friend. That means it's not all about you. Same as marriage or any relationship, you have to give up a bit of yourself in order to engage with other people. Doing things that others enjoy at times. Listening to what's going on in their lives. Shared experiences make good friends.

For a time, my wife and I had a really close group of friends. Two other couples, us, and a single gal. We all had children in their early to late teens who were having real life problems. We made trips to the hospital on a number of occasions, sometime late at night, to be with others in the group during the hardest of times. We had card night once a month and played a game call President. We would laugh until it hurt and at times cry because life hurt. I will forever feel a connection to that group of people.

I have a few good friends right now:
- My Wife - I love her dearly
- My Children - working on building these relationship as they are all out on their own now
- One guy - His hobby is working on cars, he has a shop, and he has all the tools. Enough said
- Another guy - He leads a group that I volunteer for. We guide kids on fishing and hunting trips
- A third guy - he is working though the hardest time in his life and finally dealing with issues of his childhood
All different situations. Some of which I put in a huge amount of effort with nothing to gain and others where I put in very little effort in return for experiences that are priceless.

Reach beyond yourself.

During college and right out of college I had a handful of groups that we'd do stuff together. I had a couple friends that all went snowboarding together. Then I had a couple other friends that we'd go brook trout fishing together, and then a group that went to the boundary waters together.

The snowboarding group moved away with the exception of one fella, who got a little bit of a later start at the family things and his kid is about 10 years behind mine. This has resulted in about 1 snowboarding outing per year. I'll still give him a call maybe once a month to just chat and see what's up.

Brook Trout fishing - they all moved away, became busy or just got less interested.

Boundary Waters group - the original group was 4 of us and we started out going every year, often times twice. Interest waned quickly for some and more slowly for others. As I've had a resurgence of interest, the rest have not and I struggle to get at least one guy to go on one trip per year.

I still talk to a number of these friends nearly weekly and we'll get together maybe once a year for a football game or beer...maybe I can coax them into snowboarding or a BW trip.

Over the years I've tried joining local groups with limited success. What I've found about local groups is they're very "in to it" is the best way I can put it and casual participants struggle to fit in. My interests have always been far and wide.

mschi772:

I am curious if anyone knows of any public events/meetups within this realm of canoeing/camping/backpacking where one might stand a better chance of making new connections. I also know there is a group of hammockers that will do group outings once in awhile, but I never know about them until after they've happened.

YES!! I am one of those hammockers in Wisconsin (and sorry with Covid they haven't been openly announced much), however, I also run a this MeetUp group:

https://www.meetup.com/Milwaukee-Area-Outdoors/

We just merged with a paddling group and I'm looking for people who are comfortable leading / co-leading paddling events.

What we're about:
• outdoor enthusiasts who want to meet new people, see new places, learn new skills and teach others
• people who like to spend a few hours hiking a trail, paddling at a state park or weekend camping
• the experienced experts and first-time newbies
One of the most important aspects about our group is to get out of the city and connect with nature.

Join us!!! It's free!

I can relate, I live in a smaller town and spend my time with my wife and 2 kids. I focused on fishing, family, and work in my late 20s/30s, and now I don't have many friends. Work makes summer trips difficult, but I try to do a March laker trip and sometimes a shorter fall trip. I welcome anyone interested in joining me for any type of MN adventure. I enjoy muskies, stream trout, walleyes, ice camping in the BWCA, bikepacking, and of course paddling.

If there is an interest in a weekly video wingnight similar to how chat used to be, I am happy to set it up. I can't be on each call so a few people who need to be ambassadors of the video chats to get them started.

I’ll echo the “reach beyond yourself” advice. Not to sound mean or imply that you’re being being selfish, just suggesting an effective method of filling the void through moving into the world looking to give, not get. Things can click before you know it.

I was going to suggest the Ice Age Trail Alliance but I see someone else has already mentioned it so I'll second that one.

If you check out the Wisconsin State Park's website they often have outings and meet ups that the "Friends" of the State Parks put together. There have been some nice events.

(As an atheist introvert with fully grown children who resides in south east WI, I'm rather enjoying the solitude that Covid has brought. But discovering Canoecopia a few years ago, I kinda understand wanting to group with likeminded individuals.)

mschi772: "

butthead: "I'm open to sharing some time and live close. If you can put up with a old geezer. I'd be open to a brew and swapping tall tales at your convenience.



butthead"

Yeah, we should meet up in some fashion at some point. I won't pretend like there's no difference between younger peers, similar-age peers, and older peers, but that doesn't mean I've got anything against any "old geezers" either."

If you’re not adverse to an even older geezer, I’d be happy to join you guys. And I am located in Racine.

I appreciate the suggestions and have already followed-up on many. Ultimately I'd like to connect with people who are local enough and of roughly similar age such that I might actually have friends I can casually pass time with and share a variety of experiences with again someday which is highly unlikely to happen with some of these, but that's my problem, not yours. I already have a number of long-distance "friends" that I don't see 99% of my life, and that's a big part of the problem for me.

here's a thought. i was listening to our local radio station this morning and there was an interview with some Lion Club members. a very active volunteer organization. you might look into service organizations such as the Lions, Rotary, Optimists....