WOW! WOW! WOW! I can’t believe that I’m really here - that I’m really going to do this! A BWCA solo - never in a million years would I have ever thought I’d do such an adventure. I only hope that it is the first of many.

I was able to bug out of work a little early - thanks Ang! I figured it would take about three hours to get to Sawbill outfitters and I figured correctly. I pulled in at about 6:50 - the shop was still open so I was able to get my canoe, watch the video and get my permit. By the time I got the van situated it was too dark to take the canoe out or try walking with it ~ will just have to wait for morning.

The drive up was uneventful - thank goodness. I stopped in Two Harbors for gas and potty break & that was it - no other stops. As I got closer and closer to Tofte my anxiousness to be here grew - I think I was racing the clock. That made me think of the one statement Mitch said: “A car is not a time machine” and that is so true!

As I drove up Sawbill trail I felt a peace of mind that words just can’t describe. The sun was setting behind the Sawtooth Mountains, reflecting on the early fall colors, red and gold. The sky was a beautiful blue with just a few puffy clouds. In my mind I felt such a release and relaxation come over me ~ something about nature, Gods awesome creation and being one with it is just . . . . I don’t know, Fabulous? Fantastic? Awe Inspiring? And I haven’t even really started my trip yet!

As I was privatizing (is that even a word?!) the van (towels and pillow cases duct-taped over the windows) Mitch came over and introduced himself. It’s so cool that there’s this entire community of people brought together by one common passion - BWCA. Everyone that I’ve met so far has been so awesome. The willingness to accept new-comers, the sharing of knowledge and the trust of the members shows me that all is well with the world.

After I finished in the van I walked down to the boat landing. It was pretty dark so there wasn’t much to see. I’m hoping to capture some photos of those “White Horses” one of these cool mornings. After I was done at the boat landing I found Mitch again at his campsite and we visited for a while. It’s odd to me to feel like you’ve begun a new friendship when you haven’t even met them in person. I think that’s what draws me to BWCA.com. The camaraderie ~ even without having met anyone face to face. We had a nice chat and I enjoyed meeting and getting to know him.

The CCS pack I borrowed from Kyle is FANTASTIC! That will definitely be on my Christmas/Birthday list - I haven’t even hardly used it yet and I already know that I like it.

I wanted to have a fire tonight but after getting things ready for bed and for tomorrow it’s too late and I need to get to sleep. The last couple of days I was like a kid at Christmas ~ so excited and ready to go! Today at work was the worst. Thank goodness I was busy so it made the day go fast.

I’m looking forward to the gorgeous weather that is in the forecast. Each day that it’s been sunny I’ve thought about Jan and GSP on their trips as well. I’ll be back before Jan and can’t wait to hear about his Quetico trip. I’d really like to try that. BUT patience is needed as I get some experience under my belt. If I can make it work I’m hoping to have four long weekend trips next summer. Lottie would like to go and so do Mom and Manda. I’ve got lots of planning to do this winter!

Time to read now before sleep sets in . . . zzzzzzz

It’s foggy this morning - the dense, think, pea soup kind. The trees across the lake are only a dark bruise amidst the white. The streamers of mist coming off the lake look like belly dancers the way they sway. The water is like a mirror and there’s absolutely no breath of breeze out there. I hope it stays that way! Somewhere on the water a fish just jumped and the campground is starting to wake up.

I was awake before 6:00 am but laid there until about 6:10 then decided to get everything out and ready to go. I still need to wait for the store to open so that I can pay for the campsite last night. Besides it’s awful foggy to be starting out yet - don’t know that I’d find the portage!

Took the canoe out for a test paddle - with just me in it boy was it wobbly. I’m hoping that loaded and trimmed it will be better. I can’t believe the difference in weight - wow. We are definitely going to have to invest in a lighter canoe for our family - even if it’s a solo for me - then I can take it whenever I want. Load the gear and be off.

I chatted with Mitch again for a few minutes this morning for a few minutes - such a nice guy.

Am trying to get a few photos but they’re just big, white blobs - the fog is just too thick. I can see why they’re called “white horses” I hope the sun comes out soon!

Portaging the canoe wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be though I know I’m not ready to haul it on long, tough portages. Just walking down from the store my arms got tired. There’s a hint of a breeze now starting to pickup - hope it doesn’t get too windy! I can see the trees across the way clearly now - only waiting for the sun. More later . . .

11:17 am - I took off from Sawbill campground around 8:15 am and made it to the portage to Alton in about 30 minutes. The water was pretty calm but the air was very foggy - those darn white horses. Once I reached the portage I decided to triple it - just to be safe - it was only a 30 rod. Wasn’t so bad - nice wide trail with a few rocks but not bad. I took a few pictures along the way and just enjoyed the solitude and morning calm. I heard a few birds, chickadees mostly and ravens. I made the portage without incident - okay, we’re doing good, loaded the canoe, went to get in and DUMPED it! Good grief - at least it was only in about a foot of water. Got my ass and feet wet and I’ve never moved so fast to haul gear around. The wettest things were me and my day pack. I need to get a better one - this is just an old school backpack - note to self, another item to put on the ever-growing Christmas list.

Okay, so now I’m wet but not freezing - re-loaded the canoe and was a bit more careful getting in this time - and off I went. Alton is a bigger lake, not as big and scary as Pine was. The water is crystal clear and there are a lot of rocks - I was hugging the shore so I had to really watch that - I didn’t want to come up on one too fast and dump in the middle of the lake. The water was calm so it was pretty easy to see them. I would paddle, paddle, paddle, and glide - nice and easy - soaking in the serenity that I’m finding here. I had a short bout of anxiety as I got into deeper water but it quickly passed. I slowly meandered along the shore until I found a camp-site - decided not to go as far as Kelso since I need to dry out and check the gear. I think I’m at site #867 - was shooting for one further north but this one works. It doesn’t have a very nice landing but I got unloaded without too much trouble. The tent pad is rocky and full of roots but I’ll make due - that’s what it’s all about anyway - doing it because I CAN!

First things first -find dry clothes. Nothing like standing butt naked in the middle of the forest ~ at least there haven’t been any skeeters to bite my bare butt. Ahhh dry feet - so much better! Didn’t take too long to set up camp - the tent is a bit of a bugger doing alone but I got it. Decided to use the footprint as an outie this time due to the condition of the ground; I don’t want holes in the bottom of the tent.

Once camp was set up I sat on the rock by the water just drinking it all in - oh, and eating an apple. I skipped breakfast - that’s bad - but wanted to get moving. There’s a campsite directly across the lake - at least it looks like one - but it’s unoccupied. I’ve seen a few groups go by heading north. Not sure if they’re day trippers or overnight paddlers. None of them appear to be looking for a campsite - they just kept on-a-truckin’.

This mustn’t be an often used site as there were a lot of sticks and branches down - ready made firewood! And the latrine hadn’t been used in quite a while. It’s nice and private here with a row of trees all along the shore to “hide” the site - black spruce and white cedar. Some of the cedar needles are brown - perhaps stress from a dry year? Of course there are birch trees aplenty. Up the trail to the latrine (why is it ALWAYS up hill?!) there are red and white pine. Behind the tent pad is a blueberry patch - I found . . . . Two. However, I’m glad they’re picked over then no berry seeking bears will come by. The sun is flirting with me - peeking from the clouds and then hiding again. I did put up the rain tarp - just in case. I don’t thin there’s rain in the forecast but better to be prepared. If I have my bearings correct the clouds are moving from North to South - but the compass is on the pack - waaaaaay over on the other side of camp and I’m too comfy to move.

I snacked for lunch - a bit of chex mix and some beef jerky. Maybe will have a pudding after a while.

The breeze is picking up and I’m glad that I stopped for the day. I’m chilly as I sit here and am contemplating taking the canoe out to explore the shore and find the portage to Kelso, but the sun is starting to peek out again and it feels so good. Besides that I’m not so sure that I want to fight the waves in an unloaded canoe. I left the knee pads in the van as the yoke is right where I’d want to kneel if I was gonna paddle that way.

All the weeks of planning and I’m really here and really alone. No phone, no fighting kids, no TV, no radio, no cars, no barking dog, no “mommy….” or “hey Lisa…..” Mitch said something last night that really struck me “This is my spiritual retreat.” And it really truly is. Besides that small bout of anxiety on the water I feel such peace and calm. The only sounds are the wind through the trees, the water lapping on the shore and the birds. There’s a few flies droning by and one red squirrel, but he hasn’t scolded me too much. I’m not lonesome yet. We’ll see how that goes in the dark! I don’t know that I’d want to do a really long trip alone - eventually I’d need someone besides myself to talk to. I think I’ve actually only spoken aloud a few times - the “oh SHIT” when I dumped the canoe and “hey little guy” to the squirrel. Hummed a little to myself on the portage trail - Johnny Cash (hee hee) - listed to that on the way up after my radio station didn’t come in any longer.

The clouds are puffy and gray on the bottoms. I hope that doesn’t mean rain - more later . . .

2:00 pm on the nose! The sun is out and I’m basking in the warmth. The sky is that brilliant blue that only Minnesota has and there are puffy cotton ball clouds floating casually by. There’s still a nice breeze and the waves are a bit more aggressive - again - glad I’m parked for the day. I have been completely and blissfully alone since before lunch when the last group of paddlers went by - I’m thinking they were day trippers from the campground.

Earlier I had to get the long-johns and sweats on - I was so chilly! Then I got my butt outa my chair (I’m sure glad I brought that!) and walked the trail behind the tent. I hit the jackpot! Found a downed tree resting on another with branches the perfect size for fire wood. I went back to camp, got the saw and hauled a whole bunch back to camp - made two trips! Spent the better part of about two hours breaking up and sorting it into piles by size. I should be able to have a nice fire tonight. AND, bonus! The wood is dry! I pulled a good one though and cut my finger while sawing. Dur, pay attention Lisa! It’s not too ad. Squeezed it for a few, cleaned it, put goo and band-aid on and all better.

I have yet to crack open a book or magazine - other than my journal. I’m enjoying just drinking it all in. I could live like this - I really could. But, that’s not going to happen so I’ll just have to be satisfied with visiting several times. What I think is so amazing are the parents who bring their kids and teach them about this at a young age. It’s so important to instill in them - while they’re teachable - this love for nature. I’ve always enjoyed the outdoors. I wish mom and dad had continued camping and canoeing with us kids. Perhaps that’s why I’ve made it such a priority to always take the kids camping. However, now that I’ve been ‘real’ camping, car camping just won’t ever be the same.

I hear voices (and no, not in my head). The first since this morning. All day I’ve just enjoyed listening to the birds, water and loons. I thought I heard a trumpeter swan earlier today. Sounded like it was coming from over the ridge. I didn’t see it though. There’s a flock of geese across the lake that the paddlers disturbed earlier. They were honking and scolding so loud it just echoed across the lake.

I have a little visitor but he’s not as friendly as Booger was; he’s a bit shyer. He must be doing well for himself because he’s nice and plump.

The trees across the lake - and even in the campsite - aren’t as brilliant yet as I had hoped. There are a few smatterings of red and gold, but still more green than anything. With the cool weather coming next week, though, it won’t be long before they do turn.

3:10 pm - It’s about 65* - in the sun according to my compass/thermometer. I keep moving my chair around to stay in the warmth. I’ll start a fire pretty soon. I have neighbors somewhere but haven’t figured out where. I don’t see anyone - just hear the banging of the canoe and talking. The sound carries so far across the water that it’s hard to judge exactly where it’s coming from. I also keep hearing the loons but have yet to see them. I wonder if there are more here during the summer. I would think that some have begun their southward migration already. It’s so nice that there are virtually no bugs - a few here and there but certainly not like they’d be in the summer months. I’ve always enjoyed fall camping and that is one reason why.

I haven’t decided if I’ll stay here tomorrow as well or if I’ll pack up and move to another site. I think I’ll just wait and see how early I wake up and what I feel like in the morning. I’m sure sleepy sitting here in the sun - maybe there will be a nearly bed time . . . .oh but I want to sit by the fire - I didn’t get to do that last night and the fires that Em and I had on our trip were so pathetic.

The sun reflecting on Alton is shimmering like billions of diamonds and it’s so beautiful. I know I keep saying that but it’s true - I just can’t even put words to it that will justify it.

So, what have I learned so far? I’ve learned that I like having a chair to sit in, I brought too much food - again, I like having the mud boots for wet-footing it, BUT dumping the canoe fills them with water and defeats their purpose. Gear needs to be centered and stable and to double check before taking off. I’ve learned that I am thoroughly enjoying my alone time - even though so many thought that I was nuts for doing this trip.

I moved my chair down by the canoe landing - there are two big boulders set in the shoreline and I have the pack on there to finish drying out - it’s almost here. There are huge boulders all over in the camp and surrounding woods. I can’t fathom the force of the glacier as it moved the earth and these boulders around - that force is unimaginable.

It’s going to be a beautiful, clear evening. The wind is picking up and pushing what’s left of the clouds away. I hope to be able to stay awake and watch the stars. The darkness here is going to be so all encompassing, so almost suffocating I bet. I don’t think there’s much of a moon - if any - tonight either.

If the lake is calm in the morning I think I’ll try heading up towards Kelso and down through Sawbill. I’ll have to look at the map to figure out a good campsite. The water is pounding on the rocks so hard that I keep thinking there’s a moose or some other big animal nearby - but there isn’t - it’s only the waves. 4:07 and time to get the fire going. I’m hungry. BUT I’ forgot my steaks in the freezer at work. I was so anxious to get going I completely forgot about them. Good thing I had back-up! 4:32 pm I MADE FIRE! I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR!! And I did it WITHOUT lighter fluid. Only used two homemade cotton ball fire starters and a pile of good dry kindling, two matches and Viola - Fire. 5:09 “Suppers over and the dishes washed….” Stupid mess kit is tippy - another note to self - don’t use handle or better yet, get new mess kit! Trying to use the handle I dumped about ½ the noodles out. Still it was okay because it was too much food. Next time I’ll split the packages into four servings - the third size was too much food. It’s early and I know I’ll need a snack before bed. Maybe some peas or applesauce. Too full right now to worry about it. Supper was Thai Sesame Knorrs (Thanks Jan!) with chicken - I put it all in one pot over the fire and cooked it until the noodles were done - yummy.

I sure got myself a nice fire going tonight - yee haw. How grubby am I though? You don’t want to know. Thank goodness it hasn’t been hot - I hate getting sweaty. There’s not a cloud in the sky - it’s gonna be clear and cold I think tonight. Hope I’ll be warm enough! The sunset is going to be spectacular and I have a marvelous view of it. I’m glad that I chose the west facing shore.

6:51pm Sunset was glorious - I know it’s not truly 100% set yet, but it’s behind the ridge and will get dark soon. I sat on the rock and watched it set - took several photos and will see how they turned out when I get home. There’s something up with the camera - I s’pose it got damp in the dunking. Oh well, at least it’s still taking pictures.

My fire is still going - sort of. The larger pieces of wood that I found are kind of wet. Even so, it’s throwing off some heat - that feels good as I’m getting chilly again. It’s sizzling and crackling and the embers below are glowing orange. I should have brought some of those color fire makers that we used at Savanna - maybe next time.

There’s a raven nearby calling and calling. The breeze has died down some, but is still whispering through the trees. The wavers are a bit tamer, though certainly not calm. I packed up most of what I could so that if it’s calm in the morning I can take off and paddle on calm water - I just can’t handle those big waves. The Vagabond was tippy enough on calm waters let along on rough. I’m sure glad that I got that one instead of the prism. I heard that the prism is a lot more rocky - no thank you!

All the little critters scurrying through the forest - I swear those tiny ones make more noise than anything. I found mouse poop under my shirt that I left on the rock. Not sure if it was there before or after I put the shirt down - delicious.

I’m a little concerned about getting loaded up in the morning - the landing isn’t very nice and I sure don’t want to have a repeat of this morning. I’ll just have to be really careful and pay attention to EVERYTHING.

It’s so nice to sit by the fire with no bugs - there’s no hum of pesky mosquitoes or buzz of flies. The only gird I hear is that raven. There’s a commercial airplane flying over - I wonder what the BWCA looks like from that point of view….There are some clouds moving in from the south - I hope they’re not rain clouds. I f it cools off as much as I think it will there will be fog again in the morning. I sure don’t feel like I did much today - but I really did. Everything is “work” but enjoyable work, relaxing work. I read, journaled, made fire wood, took pictures, walked around - a hike would have been nice, but the only long trail leads up to the throne. At least there’s no scratching my ass from mosquitoes this time. Though I’m afraid that there are monster spiders hiding under the throne rim. I took a stick and swirled it around just to scare ‘em away - I hate spiders!

My fire is dwindling and not giving off much heat. Ohhhh I hope I’m not going to be cold. Time to pack things in for the night it’s 7:17 pm - that’s early but I’m tired and chilly. More tomorrow.

Sleep did us well, real well. We woke up when we were ready, not on any particular schedule; all that madness was left at the truck with our watches in the glove box. If you have never taken a trip to Boundary Waters without a time telling device, try it. At home I manage minutes and seconds on a regular basis and everything I do becomes this ultimate time managing challenge. How refreshing to live for days at a time on the whim with no watch. We ate some famous fried pancakes and sausage and then went about lazily lounging around camp before we decided to head over and try to get the only site on Beartrap Lake. Had it not been for Stu writing down that Beartrap had good walleye fishing and a five star site, we probably would have been content to not move for days, but my partner hails from Panama and I had been talking up the solitude and fishing here for months to him back home. It was sometime in the afternoon when we finally got camp picked up and headed over to Beartrap. Right before the portage to Mudhole, we decided to cast into some boulders for our first fishing of the trip. In short order we had landed 6 smaller walleye and a smallmouth bass. Lots of fun, but we had to move on. Trolling Thunder Lake, Oscar picked up a nice northern and met some more loons, I could see him changing every minute, all the time quickly gaining a deep respect for this place. Finally we got to Beartrap Lake and the whole time paddling up the south shore I was praying we would find the site open and by late afternoon we were thanking God for answering our prayers in such a timely fashion. The site on Beartrap is by far the nicest site I have ever stayed at in the Boundary Waters. The intricate log seating provides a backrest for fire gazing, two nice tent pads, a notched stump for sawing wood, good canoe landing, food pack hanging tree, and two roman columns (Red Pines) frame the view from fireside. We went fishing right away, trolling the shorelines, and picked up a few good sized northerns but no walleye or smallmouth bass. After dinner, I would guess it was about 10 o’clock; we laid out on the giant granite slab and watched the stars in total wonder. While watching the stars I was explaining to Oscar about the Northern Lights and how it is a rare treat to get to see them. Right as we were getting up from the rock at about midnight, after a long spiritual conversation, Oscar asked me if the Northern Lights looked like the green mist over the horizon on the far north shore of the lake. "Yes, exactly like that as a matter of fact." It felt as if the Heavens were shining down upon us in the middle of a star filled night sky. What a trip this was turning out to be. 

I’m definitely almost back. It’s such a quiet peaceful morning - the chatter of red squirrels, call of robins and fish jumping. There’s not even the slup-slurp of waves against the shore. The only sound is my paddle very now and ten. The campfire smoke is pouring out of the campground and creeping over the calm surface of the water like some eerie poison gas - something out of a movie.

Back at Sawbill campground: I’m finding that I’m not ready to leave yet. There are several groups that are unloading and leaving - men mostly. Unloading didn’t take long and went off without incident. Carried the canoe up to the store and took the van down to get the rest of the gear. Settled up at the office and visited with Bill for a few minutes. Decided that I’m not ready to leave yet - want to finish up this trip journal first.

I woke this morning at about 6:10 am and laid there for a while but not long cuz my body was screaming at me to get up and get moving around. I had to mind or suffer further punishment later.

As I packed (as all weekend) I’ve though about my friend on their various trips wondering how they’re doing, have they found what they were seeking? I know I did. I found peace and serenity beyond words. I found strength and courage in myself that I didn’t realize were there. I found that I can tackle those big waves and wind and that I’ll pull through. I learned that dumping a canoe isn’t so bad. Most of all my passion for canoe camping has turned from a small fire to an inferno - that needs to be fed - whether by trips, reading or new gear it’s going to grow and grow and never be contained.

That being said, I look forward to a winter of planning trips for myself and my family. Farewell BWCA until next time - and Happy Paddling!